GETTING TO COMMITMENT: Overcoming the 8 Greatest Obstacles to Lasting Connection (And Finding the Courage to Love) by Carter Steven & Sokol Julia

Author:Carter, Steven & Sokol, Julia [Carter, Steven]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: PSYCHOLOGY / Interpersonal Relations
ISBN: 9780984975778
Publisher: Carter/Sokol
Published: 2012-04-24T04:00:00+00:00

ROMANCE AND REALITY CAN EXIST SIMULTANEOUSLY

My goal here is not to take a giant hose and squelch every romantic thought or feeling you could ever have with a blast of cold water. What a drag that would be. I like to think there's a lot of romance in my life. Why shouldn't it also be in yours? But I have learned that romance can be the result of the strength of the connection. It can be borne out of something real, and this is what I wish for you.

It's fine to be romantic—wonderful to be romantic—as long as you can also be pragmatic. One doesn't preclude the other, unless you choose that to be the case. Love, by its very nature, is romantic. And the stronger the bond, the more romantic it can be. I'm not trying to stamp out romance. I'm just trying to keep you from getting lost in the woods.

The point is that there needs to be an overriding intelligence to the way you conduct your romantic life, whether you are in hot pursuit or being hotly pursued. You need to be balancing your fantasies and intense feelings with clear thoughts and self-protective choices. If you can't create a balance—if you are feeling powerless in all of this—this is not a healthy sign that you are fully and completely in love. It is not a reflection of having found "great love." It is not a cause for celebration. If you are feeling powerless, it is a sign that you have either chosen to give up your power, or that you have been rendered powerless by an all-consuming need. Neither one of these is healthy or self-protective. And both deserve examination.

If your heart is open, there will always be room for romance. But you cannot trust that the universe will protect you just because you are in love. The universe will only protect you if you are protecting you.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.